Sunday, April 29, 2012

Like the widow

Growing up, I was virtually inundated with amazing stories from the Bible - waters parting, bringing the dead to life, food appearing, water into wine, and more.  I loved it all -- the mystery and wonder of God's power are limitless.  One story that always appealed to me was in 1 Kings 17:  10-16.

10 So he went to Zarephath. When he came to the town gate, a widow was there gathering sticks. He called to her and asked, “Would you bring me a little water in a jar so I may have a drink?” 11 As she was going to get it, he called, “And bring me, please, a piece of bread.”  12 “As surely as the Lord your God lives,” she replied, “I don’t have any bread—only a handful of flour in a jar and a little olive oil in a jug. I am gathering a few sticks to take home and make a meal for myself and my son, that we may eat it—and die.”  13 Elijah said to her, “Don’t be afraid. Go home and do as you have said. But first make a small loaf of bread for me from what you have and bring it to me, and then make something for yourself and your son. 14 For this is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: ‘The jar of flour will not be used up and the jug of oil will not run dry until the day the Lord sends rain on the land.’” 15 She went away and did as Elijah had told her. So there was food every day for Elijah and for the woman and her family.16 For the jar of flour was not used up and the jug of  oil did not run dry, in keeping with the word of the Lord spoken by Elijah.

This is not just a story of God increasing a person's food.  This is God making sure that a widow - a woman who was, to a certain extent, a victim of her circumstances - could take care of herself and her child.  This is God showing that this woman should not just be a part of the rhetoric, she should be truly taken care of for as long as she needed.  This is God never giving too much, but always giving enough.  

These days, sometimes I feel just like the widow.  Not in the victim of her circumstances way - but in the somehow things are always just enough way.  I have now cried twice after visiting the bank.  The first time was when I needed to pay the $2300 in Home Study fees.  I went to the bank to deposit a check from extra work at school and had just transferred the money from the online donations.  When I asked for the balance, the teller said - $2,324.  I walked to the car, sat down, and fell apart.  Somehow, all the extra hours at work, the kindness of friends and family, and the new job had just covered what I had to send out that day.

Friday, I finally had time during the banking day to deposit the money from the benefit - and another check from extra work at school.  After it was in the account, the teller asked if I'd like the balance.  $3,964 she said, and I barely kept it together until I got in the car.  You see, I had just made that $4,000 payment to the adoption agency by credit card with faith that I could cover it by the due date somehow - knowing that I might have to borrow some money to do so.  Sometimes this working ALL THE TIME thing is starting to get to me.  I'm exhausted, my house is a mess, and I just want an hour to myself.  But then I have moments like this, I look at my pictures of Tanya, and I remember why it's all worth it.  I never thought I'd make it this far in the process without a loan.  And yet still, by the grace of God, here I am.

That's right ... just like the widow.

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